It wasn’t that I didn’t believe in God. I very much believed in God. I believed that God would be sending me to hell because of the sinful behavior I couldn’t seem to stop no matter how I tried. I believed that He must hate me, because I hated myself.

What I didn’t believe was that God had the power to help me recover. I did not believe that God could restore me to sanity.

Nine years ago, I was invited to Celebrate Recovery.

I learned that I was not alone in my experiences. Others had been hurt by people they trusted and turned around and inflicted hurt onto others. Others has self-protection mechanism that not only did not work, but were extremely destructive. Others were seeking and longing for something that seems forever just out of reach.
But I learned something else. I learned that recovery is possible. I learned that I wasn’t meant to navigate these hurts, habits and hang-ups alone. That God was always there and He always would be.

So, I got myself in a step study group. I got myself into small groups were I could share my thoughts and feelings in a safe place instead of holding everything in.

Then Mrs. Brenda put me at the welcome table. Boy, I didn’t want to do it. But I had got to Step 12. I needed to carry this message of healing that I’d found to others.

Another part of my Step 12 is testimony. Before I wished I had a different story. But I have to accept this world as it is not as I would have it. That includes all the parts of my story.
That’s what I will be doing in Rayville tomorrow at 5:30- telling the story of how I met Jesus and how He changed everything.
Hope to see you there.